How many times have you been in a relationship that you thought was going to end up in marriage? How many guys have you been with and thought ‘this is the one’ only for things to turn sour when you least expected? What I know about relationships from my experience is that we often enter into a commitment with someone we love and adore with the right intentions yet in most cases, the relationship never pans out the way we projected that it would.
Commitment, Passion and Respect are three essential ingredients for a lasting happy relationship. These 3 cannot sustain a relationship without the following pointers I’m going to share with you. For a long lasting blissful relationship, both partners should;
Know Thyself: I didn’t say know yourselves, I said know yourself. What I mean by this is, for anyone to be able to know how to treat you; you have to have an idea of how you want to be treated. You have to know what you strengths and weaknesses are as well as worked on yourself to the point where you’re able to give and receive love. Outside of the relationship you should have your own life and aspirations that are independent of what goes on in the relationship.
Be Sure That You’re Both Equally Committed: You might wonder how possible it is to make this happen but it is a known fact that when one party is more committed to a cause than another party, the committed party tends to come off a bit too strong thereby giving the other party a feeling of importance. When you are more committed to a relationship than your partner is, you subconsciously project yourself as being dependent on them even if that’s not true. Give as much as you’re receiving and make sure your needs are met.
Allow Room For Errors And Imperfections: Like it or not, nobody is perfect. Not even your dream guy. You have to be able to tolerate some of your partner’s shortcomings. This is not to mean that you have to take every BS they dish your way in the name of errors or being imperfect. You just have to be patient and tactful when pointing out some of their flaws to them so as not to sound like you’re being critical or judgmental.
Make Time Out For Nurturing Your Relationship: Love and ultimately your relationship require time and attention. Love is like a seed which will grow into a beautiful tree if adequate time and attention is dedicated to it. We all know what happens to an untended garden, the same applies to a relationship that’s not getting enough time and attention.
Be Willing To Forgive: this is a complicated one because it takes a lot of wisdom to discern situation when one should be forgiving from those where one should be uncompromising. From my little knowledge though, the greatest crime a brother can commit is cheating and for this, the maximum amount of forgiveness is once. All other crime against the love/relationship should be considered rationally and forgiveness should be an option in any of these cases.
Manage Conflicts: If your relationship is going to go as far as you hope that it would, managing conflicts will come in every now and then. You have to learn to control strong emotions. Sometimes in the heat of the moment, we’ll say things we don’t mean and can’t take back. To avoid the regrets that ensue after these moments, it would do a lot of good to learn to control strong emotions.
Keep The Passion Upbeat: Passion is the lifeline of any healthy relationship. Find time to explore common subjects of interest. The fact that you are now in a relationship doesn’t mean you should close the door on those interesting things you used to do together before.
Communicate: Change is a constant in anyone’s life. As such, communication is vital to ensure that your partner understands what’s really going on in your mind when you start to experience some changes that might send the wrong signal to them.
Trust Each Other: Trust is earned. You have to conduct and portray yourself such that your partner will be able to trust in you. It’s a building process that can take time.
Respect Each Other: You have to show some regard for your partner both in private and in public. How you talk to them, treat them and refer to them go a long way in communicating the fact that you respect them.
Develop these pointers and watch your relationship go as far as you want it to. In the event where it doesn’t, then you weren’t meant for each other cause these are the game winning principles of dating as told by people that have experienced their love relationships blossom into marriage.
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